Ritual

Andy Weigert liked golf and Dewar’s scotch.

So today, as we do every year, the DB and I poured a Dewar’s on his gravestone and left a Titleist in a graveside divot.

Andy left us 15 years ago yesterday.  Just 46.  Cancer.  He was my golf partner and our very good friend.

It’s a simple ritual that takes just a minute or two of our time.  But it has more meaning to us than anything we could say or do in a house of worship.

And as we pour the scotch and grind the golf ball into the ground, I always remember what Andy would tell me as I stood over a six-inch putt.

“Get it close.”

Advertisements

About Gerry

I've been covering Connecticut news and sports since 1974. I know, I don't look that old.
This entry was posted in It's all about me, People and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to Ritual

  1. I liked that post. A lot. And it reminded me of looking for Norman Mailer’s grave in Provincetown last summer. I found it, but it wasn’t easy. Talked to several P-Town residents who steered me close to it. The cemetery’s groundskeeper was the one who found it for me.

    ” There it is, ” he said.

    ” That’s it?! ” I said.

    ( Cue Peggy Lee’s ” Is That All There Is? )

    No stone. Just this aluminum foil like 4 inch by 6 inch thing on the ground. With Mailer’s name on it. Tossed onto this small thing in the ground was an empty bottle of single malt scotch. And the dust cover of a collection of Gore Vidal short stories. Vidal and Mailer were arch enemies for years. Someone with a good sense of humor, and irony, had placed it there.

    Nice post.

  2. Gerry says:

    Thank you. Love the Mailer story.

  3. doughardy says:

    wonderful post. get it close. that’s really very funny and touching.

  4. Gerry says:

    And Doug, he said it with a straight face and monotone delivery. Every time.

  5. Graham says:

    Good for you Gerry,
    In this fast and frantic world we often forget to remember those who we have lost. This weekend let’s all take a moment to remember someone who has had a profound positive impact on our lives.

    In Hawaii the family of those who have passed away often go to the cemetary each year on the anniversary of the person’s death and have a picnic of the departed’s favorite foods.

    I think this weekend I’ll go to my father’s grave and have a Plain Dunkin Donut and a black coffee, his favorite foods.
    Thanks for the reminder.

    • Debby Caruso says:

      My dad died 9/27/09. I actually work at the cemetery he is buried in. Leaving work on Christmas Eve, I went to his grave, took a sip of beer (his favorite) and poured the rest on the cold grass and cried my eyes out. Rituals make us feel connected, they’re so necessary to healing.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s