DEAR ALEX RODRIGUEZ,

My name is Gerry.  I’m a Red Sox fan, but I want you to know I take no delight in your latest predicament.

I don’t feel bad for you, I feel bad for me.  You see, despite my allegiance to Boston, I truly admired your talent.  I really enjoyed watching you play.  There have been so few players who have combined grace, skill, and power as you did.  (Clemente comes immediately to mind, which is a compliment of the highest order.)   I really didn’t think you were a cheater, because I thought you didn’t have to cheat.  I thought you were that good.

Oh well.

"How's my makeup?"

"How's my makeup?"

Sure, you did the “right thing” (after consulting with your “people”) by sitting down with de facto baseball commissioner Peter Gammons.  ‘Fess up and everyone feels better, right?  Not really.  Now the Yankees are stuck with you and your contract.  Your pursuit of Hank Aaron’s home run record has been rendered meaningless. 

But again, I don’t feel sorry for you.  I feel sorry for me.  It turns out you’re just another cretin who couldn’t be satisfied with all the natural talent so many of us wish we’d been blessed with.  The magic of the Sosa-McGwire year?  Gone.  The blow Clemens struck for men of a certain age?  A pharmaceutical mirage.  I truly enjoyed watching them perform.  They cheated, and I feel cheated. 

So, Alex, that’s why I feel bad for me.

Also, I think you were wearing too much makeup for the interview.

Sincerely (something you need to work on, by the way),

Gerry

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About Gerry

I've been covering Connecticut news and sports since 1974. I know, I don't look that old.
This entry was posted in Diatribes, News, People, Sports and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

9 Responses to DEAR ALEX RODRIGUEZ,

  1. djo says:

    Way to go, Gerry. And no editing required.

  2. Stormy says:

    Clemente was The Man.

  3. hendu says:

    At least he’s the prettiest third baseman in baseball.

  4. LadyPatsFan says:

    My husband has been calling this clown A-Fraud for years. Guess he was right. Sad.

  5. Graham says:

    If I were a Yankees fan, I’d want a refund! If I bought a sweater that turned out to be defective, I’d return it. The Yankees should take his contract and return it to him. Turns out A-Rod is just another defective product. So sad. Even the President is disappointed in him. Think how the rest of us feel.
    What will the Yankees tell their season ticket holders? Do I hear “free” hotdogs for everyone on opening day? Better make sure they are “real” dogs and not imitations.

  6. Gerry says:

    And the more I think about it, the more disappointed I am in Gammons for sticking to a script.

    (djo…a special hello from gbr)

  7. Joan says:

    a far more appropriate response than the CHB column yesterday that scott gray gushed about in his commentary (the first one i’d heard all year since i’ve been boycotting wtic but i was in traffic and needed to get someplace…)

  8. Debbie Baldwin says:

    I used to be a baseball fan, but all the greed did me in. His greed started the spiral that brought on desperation and the lying. Now all the greats of that era have taught a valuable message beyond the diamond. Cheating catches up with you eventually.

  9. lori says:

    I am a huge sox fan, they are my life, my boys, my everything. Saying that, I feel sorry for the rest of the Yankee team, the ones that didn’t have to lie, cheat, act like they are the king of the team. I would absolutely hate going to work everyday and have to answer questions regarding just 1 member of our squad that makes to much money, and always has some kind of termoil around him. I think Jeter said it right in the New York Post, “It is always something”.
    I agree Gerry he did have to much makeup on, but then again he thinks he is a pretty boy anyway.
    Lori

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