That’s pretty much what I am right now.
Feelin’ large. Way too large. Clothes feelin’ tight. Way too tight.
When I’m feeling this fat, it usually reminds of me of former big league pitcher Terry Forster. He was a pretty good pitcher, and a large man. Not C.C. Sabathia large, but large enough to attract the attention of David Letterman, who, on his old NBC show, referred to Forster as “a fat tub of goo.” This became Forster’s everlasting claim to fame, and he even appeared on Dave’s show to display his girth.
It also brings to mind my other favorite “fat” story, now 20 years old. That would be Jim Schoenfeld, now general manager of the Hartford Wolf Pack, calling referee Don Koharski “a fat pig,” and urging him to “have another doughnut.” Koharski had just fallen, and accused Schoenfeld, then coaching New Jersey, of pushing him. The NHL at its best.
I got myself into this situation by eating a little too much, drinking a little too much (responsibly, of course), and spending too much time at a keyboard instead of on a treadmill. Also, 2008 will be the first full calendar year I will have gone without a cigarette since, oh, 1973. Maybe food and drink replaced cigarettes. Maybe not. Either way, it’s no excuse.
I got myself into this situation, and it’s time to get myself out of it.